It should have been so easy..

I think I finally understand my biggest flaw..I strive too much to kill two birds with one stone. This morning, as usual I would have bike rides with Jiajie and gang, but I gave that up to play a match for my medicine soccer team. Mistake number 1: This match is not a priority that I've identified in my New Year's Resolution. However, as the Medicine-Law games is coming up, I thought that it will good to play a few more games with the team to forge better chemistry on the pitch. Therefore, in order to 'cover' this mistake, I decided to do my bike training in the evening, on my own.

Upon reaching the soccer field in NUS, I realised that the kick off will be at 10am instead of 9.30am, the time that was told to me. In the minutes that led up to the game, thoughts jostled for dominance in my mind. To play or not to play, that is the question..Cell group was at 10.45am at Tampines, which means that I have to leave at 10.15am to make it on time. Mistake number 2: I decided to play a few minutes of the game then leave for cell group. The final result: I did not remain on the pitch long enough to contribute as much as I would want to, I reached cell group late, and I ended up fulfilling nothing.

This was worst than doing either things fully. At least by playing the full match or reaching cell group early, I would have at least fulfilled a certain thing. What I did was really retarded. I listed down the three priorities on the 31st of December 2008 to make my life easier in determining the things to do or not to do, instead here I was today struggling to make a decision that was long already made back then.

Today, I learnt a lesson. Linking it to my walk with God, I could see clear parallels. There were so many times when I knew I should not do certain things, but I still went ahead, thinking that I knew best. I could almost certainly say that this morning while I was making up my mind at the stands near the field, I could see the illustration of a little demon on my left shoulder and a little angel on my right shoulder, both whispering their opinions into my ears. I feel shitty.

I hope that this experience serves me well in future situations.