6-monthly reflection 2

This week long annual leave came at a rather apt time. This was my first break in 2019 (not counting the 5 days taken for the exit MCQs). Among the many things jostling for my attention, one stood out the most - my journey in becoming a surgeon.

As to when exactly did I begin to become numb to my work I cannot remember, but I would place the period sometime after my KTPH posting. It was only recently that I realised I do not recognise this person I have become. I was just going through the motion of work, the flame was gone; I was just an outer shell, not unlike a machine.

WHO has now defined burnout in its latest edition of the ICD-11 as “a syndrome conceptualised as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed.” The syndrome was characterised by:

1.       Feelings of energy depletion or exhaustion

2.       Increased mental distance from one’s job, or feelings of negativism or cynicism related to one’s job

3.       Reduced professional efficacy

I came across the above while reading some articles about depersonalisation. Reading it felt like I was reading about myself, every word rang true and it was scary. I have always been a very private person, choosing to sort things out on my own rather than seek help. Understandably, I do not believe in counselling - that process was for people who are weak. I cannot be more wrong.

This time away from work, albeit short, has kickstarted in me a process. I have sought help from a Christian counsellor, met up with a lifecoach and very roughly made plans for the next 6-months of 2019. I believe when you are at your lowest point, the only way is up. I have to alter my trajectory if I wish to continue on my journey to become a surgeon.  

“Do you still want to become a surgeon?”

I recently read Atul Gawande’s Complications, the chapter ‘when good doctors go bad’ stood out especially to me. I am sure that if I do not do something about my situation, I might end up harming patients like Dr Hank Goodman. I appreciate that there is a system in place to address this behaviour before it spirals out of control or before someone gets harmed.

The answer to the question above is: “YES”, and I will and must bring about change that is sustainable which will see me through the rest of my career. I am looking forward with fear of the unknown but filled with hope that something good will come out of this. That I am sure of, in the end, it will be OK.

Coincidence? I don't think so...

I am barely into the Preface of Fearfully and Wonderfully Made but I know without a shadow of a doubt that it is by no mere coincidence that I have brought this book up to read in India.

3 years ago, Jesselyn bought me In His Image and after reading it, I was on the prowl for its prequel - Fearfully and Wonderfully Made. The search for that book took quite a while as major bookstores in Singapore did not have stock. I managed to acquire a copy after about a year of persistent trying.

It might come as a surprise to many why I am only reading the book now and not back then when I bought it. I do not know the reasons too, but I can be pretty certain that schoolwork played a major factor. As the months and years pass by, it laid in the midst of my ever increasing 'to read' section of my bookshelf.

Last week, while packing for my trip, I decided to clear some books from that section, and Fearfully and Wonderfully Made caught my eye. It was like the other 20-odd books were not even there. My eyes were only focused on it. Little did I know, the series of events that unfolded would sweep me off my feet...

On Monday, during the welcome speech, I caught a glimpse of a familiar name in the background, Paul Brand. He was the co-author of both Fearfully and Wonderfully Made and In His Image!

Paul Brand's Medal in Orthopaedics

It was then that I realised that I could very well be doing an elective in the very hospital that Paul Brand worked in and served. It was as if I was tracing his steps in history. Prior to making it here, the word Vellore was just another name of a city to me. It was just a word. However, reading it in a book and being here at the moment of reading somehow gave me an invisble connection to Vellore. I felt like I had all along been destined to be here some point in my life - now.

A few pages more revealed that in India where less than 3% of the population claims to be Christian, nearly a fifth of all medical work is performed by Christian doctors and nurses. This is the ideal place for me to experience first hand about missions! This tied in perfectly to what happened on Sunday...

After my practical paper, Weihao and my discipleship group met at my place for our monthly session. If given the choice, I will very much not like to have the session and just have some down time before my evening flight. However, a commitment was made to one another at the very start that attendance for each session was imperative. Therefore, I denied the flesh as it was the right thing to do. During the session, we discussed about spiritual gifts and uncovering them. At the end of the session, we also shared about how we are going to make use of the 1-month before the next session to better identify our individual gifts and areas of ministry. My specific task is to share the gospel with someone in India, preferably through the healthcare system.

As I flipped through the pages, the words that I read resonated so strongly with ideals and beliefs that I have held on to for the longest time. The words rekindled the ember that was almost extinguished in my heart into a raging fire that is burning brighter than ever. It reminded me the reason why I chose Medicine - to uncover the greatness of God through the study of His greatest work, the human body.

Paul Brand wrote, "I have come to realize that every patient of mine, every newborn baby, in every cell of its body, has a basic knowledge of how to survive and how to heal, that exceeds anything that I shall ever know. That knowledge is the gift of God, who has made our bodies more perfectly than we could ever have devised."

When one coincidence occurs, you can label it as such; when two coincidences occur, you can attribute it to good fortune; when three or more coincidences occur, you must be severely devoid of spiritual belief if you are still adamant on it being down to 'good luck'! Therefore, here I am believing firmly that whatever reasons I have being here, God has plans intended for me to grow and mature in faith. Coincidence? I don't think so...

C. S. Lewis: Love your neighbour...

It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare...There are no ordinary people. You have never met a mere mortal...But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit - immortal horrors or everlasting splendours...Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbour is the holiest object presented to your senses.

Haruki Murakami: On seeing the 100% perfect girl one beautiful April morning

One beautiful April morning, on a narrow side street in Tokyo's fashionable Harujuku neighborhood, I walked past the 100% perfect girl. 

Tell you the truth, she's not that good-looking. She doesn't stand out in any way. Her clothes are nothing special. The back of her hair is still bent out of shape from sleep. She isn't young, either - must be near thirty, not even close to a "girl," properly speaking. But still, I know from fifty yards away: She's the 100% perfect girl for me. The moment I see her, there's a rumbling in my chest, and my mouth is as dry as a desert.

Maybe you have your own particular favorite type of girl - one with slim ankles, say, or big eyes, or graceful fingers, or you're drawn for no good reason to girls who take their time with every meal. I have my own preferences, of course. Sometimes in a restaurant I'll catch myself staring at the girl at the next table to mine because I like the shape of her nose.

But no one can insist that his 100% perfect girl correspond to some preconceived type. Much as I like noses, I can't recall the shape of hers - or even if she had one. All I can remember for sure is that she was no great beauty. It's weird.

"Yesterday on the street I passed the 100% girl," I tell someone.

"Yeah?" he says. "Good-looking?"

"Not really."

"Your favorite type, then?"

"I don't know. I can't seem to remember anything about her - the shape of her eyes or the size of her breasts."

"Strange."

"Yeah. Strange."

"So anyhow," he says, already bored, "what did you do? Talk to her? Follow her?"

"Nah. Just passed her on the street."

She's walking east to west, and I west to east. It's a really nice April morning.

Wish I could talk to her. Half an hour would be plenty: just ask her about herself, tell her about myself, and - what I'd really like to do - explain to her the complexities of fate that have led to our passing each other on a side street in Harajuku on a beautiful April morning in 1981. This was something sure to be crammed full of warm secrets, like an antique clock build when peace filled the world.

After talking, we'd have lunch somewhere, maybe see a Woody Allen movie, stop by a hotel bar for cocktails. With any kind of luck, we might end up in bed.

Potentiality knocks on the door of my heart.

Now the distance between us has narrowed to fifteen yards.

How can I approach her? What should I say?

"Good morning, miss. Do you think you could spare half an hour for a little conversation?"

Ridiculous. I'd sound like an insurance salesman.

"Pardon me, but would you happen to know if there is an all-night cleaners in the neighborhood?"

No, this is just as ridiculous. I'm not carrying any laundry, for one thing. Who's going to buy a line like that?

Maybe the simple truth would do. "Good morning. You are the 100% perfect girl for me."

No, she wouldn't believe it. Or even if she did, she might not want to talk to me. Sorry, she could say, I might be the 100% perfect girl for you, but you're not the 100% boy for me. It could happen. And if I found myself in that situation,
I'd probably go to pieces. I'd never recover from the shock. I'm thirty-two, and that's what growing older is all about.

We pass in front of a flower shop. A small, warm air mass touches my skin. The asphalt is damp, and I catch the scent of roses. I can't bring myself to speak to her. She wears a white sweater, and in her right hand she holds a crisp white envelope lacking only a stamp. So: She's written somebody a letter, maybe spent the whole night writing, to judge from the sleepy look in her eyes. The envelope could contain every secret she's ever had.

I take a few more strides and turn: She's lost in the crowd.

Now, of course, I know exactly what I should have said to her. It would have been a long speech, though, far too long for me to have delivered it properly. The ideas I come up with are never very practical.

Oh, well. It would have started "Once upon a time" and ended "A sad story, don't you think?"

Once upon a time, there lived a boy and a girl. The boy was eighteen and the girl sixteen. He was not unusually handsome, and she was not especially beautiful. They were just an ordinary lonely boy and an ordinary lonely girl, like all the others. But they believed with their whole hearts that somewhere in the world there lived the 100% perfect boy and the 100% perfect girl for them. Yes, they believed in a miracle. And that miracle actually happened.

One day the two came upon each other on the corner of a street.

"This is amazing," he said. "I've been looking for you all my life. You may not believe this, but you're the 100% perfect girl for me."

"And you," she said to him, "are the 100% perfect boy for me, exactly as I'd pictured you in every detail. It's like a dream."

They sat on a park bench, held hands, and told each other their stories hour after hour. They were not lonely anymore.

They had found and been found by their 100% perfect other. What a wonderful thing it is to find and be found by your 100% perfect other. It's a miracle, a cosmic miracle.

As they sat and talked, however, a tiny, tiny sliver of doubt took root in their hearts: Was it really all right for one's dreams to come true so easily?

And so, when there came a momentary lull in their conversation, the boy said to the girl, "Let's test ourselves - just once. If we really are each other's 100% perfect lovers, then sometime, somewhere, we will meet again without fail. And when that happens, and we know that we are the 100% perfect ones, we'll marry then and there. What do you think?"

"Yes," she said, "that is exactly what we should do."

And so they parted, she to the east, and he to the west.

The test they had agreed upon, however, was utterly unnecessary. They should never have undertaken it, because they really and truly were each other's 100% perfect lovers, and it was a miracle that they had ever met. But it was impossible for them to know this, young as they were. The cold, indifferent waves of fate proceeded to toss them unmercifully.

One winter, both the boy and the girl came down with the season's terrible inluenza, and after drifting for weeks between life and death they lost all memory of their earlier years. When they awoke, their heads were as empty as the young D. H. Lawrence's piggy bank.

They were two bright, determined young people, however, and through their unremitting efforts they were able to acquire once again the knowledge and feeling that qualified them to return as full-fledged members of society. Heaven be praised, they became truly upstanding citizens who knew how to transfer from one subway line to another, who were fully capable of sending a special-delivery letter at the post office. Indeed, they even experienced love again, sometimes as much as 75% or even 85% love.

Time passed with shocking swiftness, and soon the boy was thirty-two, the girl thirty.

One beautiful April morning, in search of a cup of coffee to start the day, the boy was walking from west to east, while the girl, intending to send a special-delivery letter, was walking from east to west, but along the same narrow street in the Harajuku neighborhood of Tokyo. They passed each other in the very center of the street. The faintest gleam of their lost memories glimmered for the briefest moment in their hearts. Each felt a rumbling in their chest. And they knew:

She is the 100% perfect girl for me.

He is the 100% perfect boy for me.

But the glow of their memories was far too weak, and their thoughts no longer had the clarity of fouteen years earlier. Without a word, they passed each other, disappearing into the crowd. Forever.

A sad story, don't you think?

Yes, that's it, that is what I should have said to her.

A successful training session..

The 2 wolves set out the moment the sun peeked behind dark clouds that seemed like they were going to burst any moment. Lightning was spotted in the distant mountains, and the 'white-haired' blizzard was about to mount its assault onto the grassland..

The aim was clear, the motive instilled..They were going to go against the elements. The dark clouds were soon chased away by the 'white-haired' blizzard and the heat of the sun belted down onto the wolves. They were undeterred..Unstirred from their task at hand, they forged ahead. It was clear that they were training for something; something that would ensure their survival in the future.. The wolves were going against the elements to use them as an advantage when the right time came: when they were pursued by their mortal enemies - the humans.

Soon, the hills, heat and the 'white-haired' blizzard were moved by their persistence and they became friends. The wolves could summon them anytime in aid for survival. They were stronger, tougher, harder than before. It was a successful training session...

n/b: Inspired from Jiang Rong's Wolf Totem

At the core of it all: An epiphany

Core definition from www.dictionary.com: the central, innermost, or most essential part of anything.

Today, I competed in my 3rd race in 3 weeks, there's still 2 more to come in the next 2 weeks! =] The race today was different from the previous races; today, I was racing with a bunch of friends who together with me had gone through 1 year of training for this event. I was racing with my team - NUS Aquathlon. It is amazing to see how I have changed over 1 year; last year's race expectations were different from this year's. I completed the biathlon last year in 1hr 48mins. Therefore, any timing this year will make me feel good about myself theoretically, but no..

Today's swim was ok..I felt good for the swim out to sea. It was at a comfortable yet slightly fast pace. I made a mistake by sticking too close to the lane rope and got boxed in. The swimmers were super rough in the water, my goggles got slightly pulled off and sea water infiltrated the left one. It was a war out there. Upon the final turn into the stretch heading back to the beach, I got disorientated and I think I swam outside the demarcated lane. There was no one (marshaller) who came up to me to direct me back! When I realised, precious time had ticked away. I was aiming for a 27-28mins swim, and with that mistake my swim time became 32-33mins.

Whilst in the water heading back in the correct direction, I was thinking that perhaps I had been too slack. I should have checked out the swim route prior to the race! With a rough guide of the route, I would have been in a better position to estimate where I was in relation to the beach. Well..as Randy Pausch puts it in his book, The Last Lecture, ''experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted." I believe that was what I had gotten in the swim today and from all the races back in 2008, experience..

Upon exiting the waters, Lincoln was there to cheer me on. I think he sensed that I was abit disappointed with my swim time as I told him the night before that I wanted to hit my target time of 1hr 15mins. "It's alright! Catch up on the run, you can do it!", was what he shouted. Off I went into the transition area, slipped on my shoes, took my running vest and bolted out for the 10km run. I was still filled with the confidence based on my 10km timing in the Newton Active Run last week and was aiming to run a 43min 10km in order to hit my target. I knew that it was possible, but I was wrong..

For the initial 5km, my anterior core section just died on me; it felt very very tense and I could not extend my stride length to go faster. I could only maintain a 5min/km pace. I have never ever felt this way before in my years of running, this was a first. Part of me wanted to just give up and seek medical attention, but another part of me wanted to go on as I was not competing for myself. I was spurred on by teammates Nicolas, Jon Ma, Zebin, Joshua Li, Kep Kee, Joshua Lim and Lemin who had made their 1st U-turn and were heading off for their remaining 8km. I hang on at that freaking slow pace.

I prayed for the pain to go away, asking God to take it all away. It was then that I got my epiphany. I have always taken part in endurance events because in the process of doing them, I find God's provision and love. He has never failed to help me whenever I needed that extra boost. He was always there for me. I looked within and asked myself, "had I done the same for Him?"

At church last night, Pastor Pacer was expounding on "Is Jesus your Lord?" He brought up very interesting points that modern day Christianity has evolved to a state of self-centredness from that of God-centredness. I could not agree more. More often than not, I find myself praying prayers like: "God, please help ME...", "God, I pray that you give ME..." It is all ME, MYSELF and I. The message preached nowadays has been diluted to the state that people receive the wonderful gift of salvation because something is promised to them. "I receive Jesus into my heart so that I can have a peaceful life ahead", "I receive Jesus into my heart so that I can experience His blessings".

Is Jesus really our Lord? Or is He just a vending machine, called to in times of need, forgotten in times of peace? Jesus owns us, not the other way round. It is expressed clearly in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, "Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body."

My cramped up core muscles also made me remember a concept I learnt while reading a book entitled: Stop Acting like a Christian, Just Be One by Christine Caine. "Just as our physical core is responsible for every move our body makes, our spiritual core is responsible for our every thought, emotion, reaction and decision." I got it now, He was trying to show me the importance of the spiritual core through the phyical core. I now understood how hard it was to run with a cramped up physical core, therefore I could parallel it to how hard it was to live in this world with a weak spiritual core! This was the wake-up call I needed.

My spiritual core is indeed pretty weak, and I have been doing nothing to try and strengthen it. As with many things in Christianity, a divine paradox once again shows up: building up a strong spiritual core will make life so much more easier to live, but to build up that strong spiritual core is not easy. I likened the run to the road of life, with a strong core, my run will be so much easier..

Soon, Shaun and Coach David overtook me at the National Sailing Centre. "Hang in there Norman!", shouted Coach. Aldrich was now also catching up. "Come on Norms, hang in there". I decided to give it a shot. I figured out that now I understood what He was trying to tell me, maybe He will take the pain off for the remainder of my run, which was about 5km. I gave chase to Coach David and Shaun and managed to catch up with the latter. After the 2nd U-turn, I upped my pace and my core loosened up more. I felt so energized and decided to revise my target to hit below 1hr 20mins.

I spun my necklace with the cross now behind my back as it was bouncing about infront and maintained the faster pace. I then realised that I was like 'carrying the cross' as stated in Luke 9:23, "And He said to all, "If anyone would come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."" It was getting really personal this time.

When I crossed the water point, I took a cup of water and gulped it down. Another realisation dawned upon me! My goodness, could you believe it that all this took place in my head during the 10km run! The water served a purpose only temporal; it quenched my thirst for the time being. It can be likened to what the world offers in terms of material possessions and the like; they will satisfy you only for the time being, after which you will be in search for better alternatives. When you take your focus off God and His will for your life, your heart begins to seek after false loves. As John 4:13 beautifully elucidates, "Jesus said to her, "Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty forever. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life."" Jesus is the only way to true satisfaction.

I finally managed to see the finishing point in sight and made a mad dash for it, hoping to hit my revised target. I crossed the line at 1hr 19mins flat on my Timex. Aldrich immediately congratulated me and helped me out. During the course of the run, I did voice out to him that my core was gone. He encouraged me throughout the entire race to hang on. My last realisation came, that spiritual support is very important in our walk with God. The people we hang out with, the support they give be it spiritual or not is very important to sustain us through life's tough patches. I feel glad that I had set a personal best which is a huge improvement from last year even though I believe that I could have done better.. However, whatever I gleaned today is still so much more apart from the race. I will end off with quotes that impacted me from my captain and boss, Aldrich, who will be stepping down in 1 week's time. Whoever is going to be captain will have really freaking huge shoes to fill! =]

"Don’t worry, you've built your base and nobody can take it away from you."
"Don’t burn out, take it easy; you’re only year 1, there’s still next year."
"This is just a small race, look at the big picture."

Amazing love

Think of a scientist, staring through his microscope's eyepiece at a microbe population gone berserk and threatening the world. He longs for a way to remove his labcoat, shrink down to micron size, and enter that microbe world with the genetic material needed to correct it.

In the context of our own analogy, imagine God, after looking with great sadness on the virus of evil that has infected His creation, casting aside His own prerogatives to take on the shell of a victim cell of that abhorrent virus in order to vaccinate humanity against death and destruction that are sure to follow. An analogy points to truth weakly; nothing could have more force than the simple assertion, "He became sin for us."

This is just something interesting I came across when reading In His Image by Philip Yancey and Dr. Paul Brand. I can still hardly grasp and fathom the love that God had when He sent His only Son Jesus to die on the Cross for us. It is simply amazing =]

Nothing but a full gazelle..

The gazelle grazed on the large grassland, totally oblivious to its predator lurking behind bushes, behind large rocks, blending in with the terrain. The wolf laid low and observed; patience was the name of the game. It will strike only when the belly of the gazelle is full and taut because it was only then that it could catch up with its swift prey. The wolf waited, no matter how long it took, it will only strike when the timing was right.

Today, I felt like that gazelle. It has been 2 weeks since I've last felt accomplished after completing the intervals on the track. Today, I waited with anticipation for the 10 x 1km interval training. I wanted to complete the training with 4mins on each lap. I knew I could do it, but something went wrong again.

1630hrs: I had my late late lunch of pork ribs noodles. It was a bad mistake as I learned later during my 6th lap. I almost regurgitated my meal onto the track! Until then, my timing has been on target, going below 4mins on the first 2 laps and hitting 4mins on the next 4. I decided to rest a set to let my stomach settle.

The 7th and 8th set saw my condition worsen. A wolf, when running away from hunters will stop to regurgitate its meal before speeding off again. Pride and survival. That was what set them apart. They will rather run to the ground, coughing up blood and subsequently die than get captured and skinned for their pelts by the hunters. Pride and survival.

I rested again and decided to complete my last 2 laps. However, after my 9th lap with a timing of 4mins 03secs, I felt the food coming up again. This was when I decided to call it a day. It was not how I envisioned my interval training to be like. I've always looked forward to run trainings because it gave me an avenue to run away from everything in this world, even if it is for just 2hrs; I was free...

Like how night is to the wolf, running has always held a special place in my heart. I know what my target is, and I will be patient, lying in the bushes, striking and peaking at the right moment. I will be a smart gazelle, speeding off into the grassland.

n/b: Inspired from Jiang Rong's Wolf Totem

The hunt for the most satisfying meal..

It was a dark and gloomy morning; the skies threatened to release its tears upon the land. The wolf crawled out of its den and met its comrade. The two were going on a hunt, one that preceded the 'organised' hunt agreed upon by the rest of the pack. The two had greater plans..

Tengger* was good to them that day and held back the rain, letting only a little drizzle fall sometime during the middle of the hunt. The two wolves started out running shoulder to shoulder, neither one wanted to fall behind at such an early stage of the journey. Pride. That was what distinguished a wolf from a dog. It was not the first time that these two hunted together; the chemistry between them was impeccable. It seemed that each knew what the other was thinking, how the other was feeling and how to react accordingly to ensure the survival of both of them.

On the way, they met two more wolves, presumably also out hunting. They looked older, bigger and much more experienced. The four wolves, with nothing said, seamlessly integrated to form a pack even though they were from different territories. This made the travelling much easier, with the alpha male leading the charge in front against the 'white-hair' blizzard*.

However, after travelling further, the differences between the young and old wolves became more significant. The fresh, light-footed younger wolves had much more stamina than the older wolves whose speed began to decrease bit by bit. The pride in the two young wolves quickly overcame them, and they broke off from the pack, running into the wind on their own. They probably felt humiliated the instant the pair of older wolves led the way, but decided to follow behind, seeing if there was anything the older, more experienced wolves did that they could pick up and learn.

The rest of the journey was simply magic, with each wolf taking the lead when the other felt tired. This drafting played on like an orchestra, each movement deliberate and precise.

Along the way, the two wolves spotted many dead animals, probably killed the night before. These included 2 rats, a snake and a bird. The two did not feed on them, considering them an insult; they wanted to eat food hunted themselves. They finally did, after 2hrs from setting off, and boy did they enjoy their kill. It tasted so sweet, and the icing on the cake was the fact that they beat the 'organised' hunt to the freshest kill of the day.

*Heaven
*very strong winds

n/b: Inspired from Jiang Rong's Wolf Totem

Slowly finding myself once again..

Today, I was touched at cell group by 2 people.. A newcomer cried when it was her turn to share, saying that it was only until today that she understood that life was so much more than just living for herself. She was touched by the many testimonies shared by us.

A friend also shared that upon looking back at his life prior to accepting Christ, isolated events which exposed him to Christianity were likened to scattered pearls, lacking just a string/thread to form a beautiful necklace. He stated that when he received Jesus Christ into his life, the missing string/thread has been found.

I sat there listening to all these unfold before me and was hugely encouraged in my spiritual walk. I will take this leap of faith with Him, and He will grab hold of me should I slip.

These days, I have been returning to my old past time - reading. This luxurious hobby took a backseat when I started Medical school in August 2008, but now I've decided to plan my time well to indulge myself =]

I've read 3 books in about 10 days! Hahas..sounds quite killer right? The first book, 'Into the Wild', left me thinking about many things in life and prompted me to stop dreaming and start taking action on certain things. The second book, 'The Wednesday Letters', reminded me of the awesome mercy God has for us, resulting in us showing the same kind of mercy to others. It reminded me that forgiveness sets you free. Lastly, the third book, 'The Last Lecture', opened up my mind to the way I should change certain aspects of my life and value the time that is bestowed to me daily. A quote from this book by Randy Pausch that popped out to me was this:

'The brick walls are there for a reason. They're not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something.'

I guess I can now start from where I stopped the previous time. I hope all is not too late..

Lastly, I'm currently reading a book entitled 'Wolf Totem', and it has proven to be a very worthy read even though I'm barely past the 5th chapter! =] Ok, that's all for this post. I have to turn in..

Join the bookworm club!

Sorry peeps, haven't been updating this blog diligently, but well, I'm doing it at last.. The past month has been one learning journey for me. Books really have the ability to transfuse values and morals and teachings to us in a way that no other medium could (at least that is what I believe, it's my opinion, do not take it as fact, unless there is scientific evidence supporting this stand).

Read many books this month like 'the curious incident of the dog in the night-time' which I felt was a little over-rated even though the author really emphatised pretty well to an autistic boy; 'to kill a mockingbird' was a joy to read, brilliantly written to drive home values and the changes we go through from childhood to adolescence; then was 'man and boy' which spoke of how the lack of self-control (or the author can argue, Harry Silver's view of love) can screw the whole world up for you, I'm going to read the sequel 'man and wife' soon when I lay my hands on it; lastly, it was 'the alchemist' which spoke of pursuing your dreams and never giving up, it was a beautifully crafted work of art by Paulo Coelho, you should read it too!

This coming month, I will be spending most of my time up in Taiwan training the cadets. I will even celebrate my birthday over there! Drats.. Anyways, bought like a couple of books from borders as my friend had like this 20% discount thing, woohoos, expanding my book collection..=] Anyways, I am leaving on the 11th of April, and will only be back on the 7th of May, so until then, I will try to blog using the computers over there, but no promises. =] Take care people and God bless you loads!